English cafe a place to eat s.th in English

[raha78]

when you forget about everything exept that closed door
but why

[raha78]

[raha78]

hi again
nobody was active

[raha78]

so seems I must do it alone
no problem
I can take care of it

[raha78]

[raha78]

Wake Up for School

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"

"But why, Mom? I don't want to go."

"Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."

"Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!"

"Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."

"Give me two reasons why I should go to school."

"Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!"

[raha78]

How to Annoy a Policeman (if you dare)!

. When you get pulled over, say "What's wrong, officer, there's no blood in my alcohol!"

If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to 70.

If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the bonnet.

. Trip and fall into him.

. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.

. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.

. Try to sell him your car.

. Ask if you can buy his car.

Tell him you like men in uniform.

Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party

[raha78]

A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, "Rest in Peace."

The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied,

"Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this...somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, 'Congratulations on your new location.'"

[raha78]

[raha78]

Tech Support Story

Technical Support: "I need you to right-click on the desktop."

Customer: "Ok."

Technical Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No."

Technical Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No."

Technical Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"

Customer: "Yes, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."